Librería Samer Atenea
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Kálamo Books
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Donde los libros
Librería Kolima (Madrid)
Librería Proteo (Málaga)
Tired of sucking? Want to rid the barriers holding you back from becoming a football star? Then jump right in to this hilariously funny guide to becoming high school's Golden Boy, college's icon, and professional football's headliner in no time. Fly through this wondrous ride as you learn how to pull the chicks and control the nerds. Don't put this guide down and walk away from unimaginable riches. You and I both know you have the potential. Your future is waiting. Oh by the way, you're welcome. Prologue If the title alone wasn't capable of helping you comprehend that this book is about football, then you might as well do us all a favor and just kind of squeeze this book back into that tiny space on the bookshelf so someone a little brighter than the average nimrod can be blessed with my knowledge. Now if you picked this up and it took you quite some time to recognize that climbing the ladder is a reference to starting at the bottom of the football food chain, and being guided by the steps all the way up to becoming a football legend, but still eventually understood, then I guess you will just have to do for now. Besides, you've already read this far. You see unlike most, maybe including you I don't know, I was blessed with a gift, the gift of being incredibly amazing at football. Well, with all this talent what do I do with it once I'm finished? I mean I may be perfect, but I'm not immortal. After pondering for quite some time I figured what the heck why not give everyone else a little sliver of my excellence? Let the lowly wastes of life that make up the rest of the population have the appetizer to my main course. Then I realized that the idea of trying to help people with no chance at all is completely idiotic and stupid of me. I decided instead to help the guys that have a few football genes inside their body. See, if you're still reading you obviously aren't one of the nobodies because if you were then you would have been appalled by my previous statements and thrown the book down then and there. Well enough chatter, let's make you a football legend. Actually I really would rather just gloat about myself for a moment so bear with me. Do you know who won the first two super bowls? If you answered Green Bay Packers you get a pat on the back. Do you know who the reason they earned the title of champion was? If you answered Bart Starr then you get a pat right across the face with the back of my hand you incompetent imbecile. Green Bay owes it all to me, yea that's right not that jerk. Man I hated that guy, it's because of him that all my stats and records were erased. He was so jealous because of how good I was; in fact his jealousy for me is most likely the cause of you not knowing who I am. Yea it's his entire fault that I became a nobody. I swear I held like every record known to football-kind, but freaking Starr had a few more connections then me and wiped my immaculate slate of accomplishments clean. So if you try searching me on the web don't bother because you won't find me, but I promise you I was amazing. For real now here we go, the start of your journey, the beginning of greatness, football stardom commences in five..four..three..two.. oh God what comes after two?!
