A Poet’s Heart Restored

MY TESTIMONYI walked in pain, brokenness fl owed through every one of my veins, hurt captured my soul & my heart became completely cold. Anger and rage ravaged my entire being and corruption had followed me around ever since the day my mother conceived me in sin. All my life I had been showered in emptiness and despair, and I lived among people that I knew would never show grace or a sense of care. Trama beat down the doors of my heart and spirit. Th e will to live echoed in the back of my mind yet it was so hard for me to hear it. Jesus tried to speak to me, yet he was so far away my soul didn’t comprehend nothing at all about perseverance. Death called out to me time and time again, I searched deep within to try and find the peace, or the ability to just stand or any kind hope for a second chance. Yet no matter how deep I searched I couldn’t seem to see past the hurt and the enormous amount of sadness and sorrow. I felt like the darkness of this world had swallowed my life, my peace, my innocence and any hope that I may have had to look forward to tomorrow. I meditated day and night on existing on more. Everything that I had known, I had seen, I had lived and felt, it consumed my entire being and rocked me to my core. Today I decided this will be the day that I will not live anymore. As I took the pills and laid down in my bed my whole life flashed before me and for the second time in my life, I finally felt a sense of peace. Like I was free, and the bright light was intoxicating, and it engulfed and overtook me the warmth and ease I felt is beyond any life experiences I have ever had and in that moment my heart was full of happiness, and I was no longer sad. A while later I remember feeling like I was pulled with force back into my room and I was vomiting convulsively while crying and thoughts ran around in my mind saying God loves me and he didn’t take his hands off me. God loves me and he didn’t take his hands off me. After that day God slowly opened my eyes, and I began to see how much he loves me, how he has always been with me and that through him I can have grace, happiness, love and peace.... Thank You Lord For Never Taking Your Hands Off Of Little Ol Me....